aggravating | 1st Command; Video

[This is so not his idea of a vacation, guys. You have no idea. But at the very least, the man peering at the screen isn't flipping out or anything. In fact, he just seems to have a sort of cool and composed air to him. If, you know, he was anything other than pissed right now.]

Okay, yeah. Fun times. Sitting on a boat in the middle of space while the world is, literally, going to hell back home without me, all because this is supposed to part of some self-awareness spiritual journey crap?

[He's been doing his homework]

Right, uh. Someone point me to the fun part of this ship, because I'm not buying into this prisoner shtick right now. Oh, and. Give me that phone call home, boss. I need to sick my lawyers on all of your asses.

Because you kind of took my property. And my AI. And my ride home.

[He makes a frustrated sound in the back of his throat, looking around before reaching down, pulling a pair of sunglasses from his pocket, ignoring the slightly bent out of shape frames - he'd kind of fallen on them more than a few times - and slipping them right up to rest on the bridge of his nose]

For anyone stupid enough to not know who I am, I'm Tony Stark. Iron Man. And the first person who asks for an autograph is getting thrown overboard.

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[That's okay Tony. Here YOU SHALL LEARN.

Buffy falls into pure awkward damage control.] No! No, no that wasn't- My foot sometimes likes to live in my mouth. Which- [She gives up, quickly changes the subject.]

Nope! Never heard of it. But to be fair we're probably not from the same universe.

[He laughs at that bit of bumbling, rolling with the topic change, if just for her benefit right now.

Hey, she's hot. And, judging on the shadows and the general proportion of things in the background, shorter than him. That means less automatic mocking.]

Yeah, now that I know for sure there's a multiverse? I'm gonna start branching market rights out everywhere.

[Much shorter I'm sure. Our little superpowered Buffy here stands at 5'2. Though she usually wears at least 3-inch heels.

Buffy just kind of.. Stares. She has no idea what to think of you just yet, Tony. But you're starting to remind her of a certain money-obsessed ex-demon friend of hers.]

Monopolizing the multiverse. Sounds like a great gameshow idea. [Heh. Heheh. Um.] So, you're big on the money-making, the inventing of.. Things. Still not getting any specifics here, Tony.

Edited 2012-05-21 06:13 (UTC)

[He rolls his eyes and... falls back on the whole auto-speech side of things. At the very least, he can do press releases when he can barely stand up on his own and see straight.

He knows this bit by heart.]

Stark Industries, the cornerstone of the modern world. Stark inventions were first features in 1941 at the World Fair, but soon enough Howard Stark, founder of the company and my father, managed to open his own expo, to get enough fame and money in order to begin mass-producing his inventions. Through him and the work our company does, we have outfitted the United States military with armors that have mortality rates down 15% in the last year, with the numbers climbing with every reinvention we put out.

We've helped develop the microprocessor to heights never before imagined, and are currently the world leaders in alternative fuel development.

Whatever you can think of, Stark Industries no doubt had a hand in making. Be it through funding or the direct technological genius of CEO and major shareholder, Tony Stark - that would be me, in case you're falling asleep over there - Stark made it happen.

[He rolls his eyes, and by the monotonous press-speech drawl of his voice, he probably hated that little spiel as much as Buffy might have hated hearing it]

[That earns a smile from her.]

I wasn't, but it sounded like you were.

I get it, you don't have to do any more thrilling speeches.

[And he grins right back]

Yeah, well, it's kind of an automatic thing. I can't tell you the amount of pre-written crap I've had to spout for reporters.

[Okay so you seem like an egotistical self-important tool, but she sort of likes you anyway.]

Yeah. Being famous, rich and a genius. I bet that's super painful.

Really don't envy you for having to do the repetitive speech thing, though. ..And somewhere, all of my friends are deeply shocked.

I own nine sports cars and mansions in seven states. It's pure, physical agony.

Not a big public speaker?

[Grin.] Uhhuh. Sounds terrible.

[..Shrug!] I do it when I have to. Which usually involves literal end of the world things.

Unimaginable torture. Seriously. Having people fawn over you? It's the big bad of the modern world.

[... Okay, he'll stop poking fun at his own playboy antics now]

Huh. [He leans closer to the communicator] End of the world? Sounds like... hell, actually.

Hence the above re: skepticism and confusion about the your world going to hell thing. [Small smile. She likes the way you talk, Tony. It reminds her of... Her, and her friends back home a little, actually.]

When you live over a Hellmouth for seven-ish years you start to think differently about these expressions.

[It's a sarcastic Californian thing, really. But hey, he's enjoying it, too. There's a lot of people here who speak the language, actually.]

Hellmouth? I'm going to pretend that's a complete metaphor and not imagine a house hovering over a giant mouth.

[This is true.

Watch as Buffy speaks way too casually about all this. And hopes you don't think she's completely insane.]

Not a house, the whole town, actually.

The mouth part's not so literal. Center of demonic energy, opens or gets all charged and bite-y usually around may, the unleashing of a demon army, entrance to a hell dimension, blah blah, end of the world.

We stopped it every time though, and oh, the last time it was technically destroyed along with the entire town, so. [Half-shrug!] I hear there's another one in Cleveland. But less of a mouth and more of a.. nostril? [...] Smaller. Less scary.

[He's half hinged on thinking you're insane, Buffy. And if you'd been sitting with him in his living room in Malibu, babbling about demonic energy and hell nostrils he'd have you shipped off to the funny farm so fast it'd make your head spin.

But.

They're on a magic space barge.

This makes potential insanity seem more like a fresh breath of reality.]

Smaller or not, I'd hate to be the one in charge of snot wiping over there.

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